The Setup
by jaggedjacket
Summary: Tenten prepares to be transfered from Itachi's unit to Shikamaru's. Wait, that sounded dirty. Me no own. Changing the rating just to be on the safe side. Complete!
1. Chapter 1

Tenten held the radio device in her hand and was tempted to snap it in two due to her frustration. Although she was new to ANBU, she knew that the equipment she received shouldn't be as damaged as what was assigned to her, unless ANBU were starting to get notorious for smashing equipment and being as irresponsible as genin. Last week it wasn't a big deal, the battery covering had come loose from a small plastic part that had gotten chipped from too much wear and tear. She easily replaced it with a cover from one of her spare remotes from home, not wanting to bring something so trivial to her superior's attention right before her first official ANBU mission. Now on her second mission, her radio antennae had been snapped clean off. There was no way she could fix this within the realm of reason. The clerk had already checked out for the day, so there was no reporting to him about her situation. That meant that she had to report it directly to her Captain, something she didn't feel was worth bringing to the man's attention, as it would only add to a list of crap he already had to deal with on a daily basis.

She sighed as she clutched the broken radio, resigned to resolve the matter quickly before putting it off before nothing could be done about it. She inspected the rest of her gear and double checked her supplies before making her way to an office which size easily rivaled that of her entire apartment. She knocked with confidence on the door, and straightened up with a respectful stance for her ANBU Captain. She opened the door fully and closed it behind her after hearing the muffled, "Come in, Tenten," from the other side.

She knew her Captain had been ANBU since he was twelve, yet it still impressed her that he knew it was her and had even bothered to call her by name.

"Sir, I apologize for disturbing you," Tenten started professionally, and the man behind the desk looked imperceptibly pleased at the distraction from the stacks of paperwork littering his oversized desk. His cold exterior had not changed at all, it was just a feeling that had suddenly struck her, though she couldn't imagine why. Perhaps the man really did need some time away from the tedious paperwork that haunted every ANBU captain. He had pushed back in his chair to show that she had his undivided attention and no doubt was putting as much distance between him and his infernal paper work as possible. "I can return at a later time, Sir, if that would be more convenient."

"I am afraid the paperwork would still be here upon your return." He offered her a small smile, something she had only heard the former member of Akatsuki did from rumors, but had witnessed them first hand on several occasions. She could understand the man was known to be intimidating, but she had yet to see such things. The eldest Uchiha seemed to be favorably inclined towards her at least, and she was determined to stay on his good side and keep it that way. She hoped this incident with her radio wouldn't get counted against her.

She offered a smile back, eyeing the deadly towers of hellish tedium without envy. She had no desire to be a Captain anytime soon. Shikamaru constantly complained about the troublesome load that was "the bane of his existence" and was "the biggest drag of all time." She had helped him out on more occasions than she cared to admit, something that was completely against protocol. The late night help promptly ended when she had the sneaking suspicion that Shikamaru was using it as an excuse to keep her after hours alone with him just so she could do his work for him. She was glad that she had joined ANBU when she did; the excuse not to help the man do his own job because she was too busy was certainly a plus.

"How may I be of service to you Tenten?" The resurrected Uchiha asked of her, eyeing the broken device in her hands.

"I need a replacement radio, Sir, the assigned one I received is damaged." As she spoke she noted the different files and forms across his desk with curiosity. The system that he had in place regarding the paperwork was adequate, but she had developed a method that was twice as productive and far less time consuming the many hours she assisted Shikamaru doing the same task. She wondered briefly if she should share it with the Uchiha ANBU Captain, or if she should leave quickly so that he could return to it as soon as possible after he helped her with the radio problem.

"And by damaged, do you mean that someone ripped the antennae off?" Itachi frowned and took the proffered device from her outstretched hands. Part of his palm grazed her fingers during the transfer, and she was amazed at how warm it was considering the office was damn near freezing. Perhaps katon worked so well because Uchiha men were naturally hot.

"Am I correct in assuming that the clerk had gone off duty so that you could not request a more suitable piece of equipment?" He looked up from the technology in his hands to pierce her with his dark eyes. She nodded, and the Uchiha sighed again, scratching at one of the lines on his face that seemed less and less pronounced these days. Maybe paperwork was good for the former Akatsuki member.

"We leave early tomorrow morning, I could put in an order for another radio, but there is no guarantee that the equipment will come in on time or not be in the same shape as this one here. I have no choice but to give you one of my own." He then proceeded to go behind his desk and open drawer after drawer in search for his extra radio. After opening and shutting all of them, he leaned back in his chair and took a deep breath as he closed his eyes. It looked like the man was praying for patience and trying to meditate at the same time. He finally opened his eyes after taking another deep breath, staunching the homicidal wave that had threatened to break his passive exterior.

"I may have to commission you formally to set traps up in my office," his voice came out even and carefully controlled.

"Sauske filched your radio," she took a stab at who could have possibly had the gall to steal from _The_ Uchiha Itachi. The former missing-nin was the obvious choice as main suspect for such a crime. Itachi probably gave him a set of keys to his office to top it all off. He always did have a soft spot for his little brother. After a moment to consider it, she continued, "I can set up a trap that no Sharingan would detect, as long as you are okay with your brother walking away with less fingers than when he arrived."

The Uchiha smiled conspiratorially this time, a glint of evil mischief in his eyes, "His girlfriend is a medic."

"As long as I don't have to clean up the mess," she shrugged.

Itachi looked at the wall clock and grabbed his keys, "I will be back shortly with a radio, would you be able to have it set up by then?"

"Yes, Sir."


	2. Chapter 2

"What are you doing here?" Shikamaru's voice could be heard through the doorway. He leaned against it instantly as he eyed the kunoichi lounging in Captain Uchiha's chair. She was holding a weapon with awe out in front of her. Itachi was obviously gone.

"Good evening to you too, Captain Pineapple Pants." She looked up with a smile, but then quickly set her eyes back onto the blade she held reverently in her hands.

"How many times do I have to tell you to just call me _Captain_?" Shikamaru pleaded for the umpteenth time. "I understand the 'pineapple', but why add the 'pants' part on anyways? That doesn't even make sense."

"Because it's funny, _Captain_ _Pineapple Pants_," she swiveled in the chair, "Captain Pineapple just doesn't have as good of a ring to it. Would you rather me just call you _Captain Nara_?" She looked up from the blade with a pointed look.

Shikamaru shrugged, "I suppose not."

"Am I drooling?" she mumbled changing the subject as she returned her attention to the blade in front of her, "Because I definitely think I should be drooling." She continued to stare at the piece of metal in her hands without offering up a reason why she was in Itachi's office.

"Captain Uchiha is not going to be pleased when he finds out you've been going through his things without his permission. Do you have any idea how much trouble you are going to be in when he finds out?" He shoved off of the door frame to cross over to the desk and stand behind her so he could get a good look at what had her so fascinated.

"This, do you see this right here?" she pointed to a small insignia on handle's butt, "there were only about 200 of these ever made by…" she flipped it over and showed him the bolster of the blade, "that man. He was a master craftsman and had only three successors. This blade is extremely rare. I found it in one of his drawers."

The tanto didn't look like much more than a regular standard edition weapon, except the handle had been wrapped in the primary Uchiha colors and garnished with a large fan emblem.

"This is the original wrapping on the handle; I believe this was made personally for a member of the Uchiha clan."

"It's just a knife," he said with resignation, leaning back on the wall behind him.

"Bite your tongue!" she chastised as she swiveled the chair in his direction. The smile on the corner of his mouth gave away that he was teasing her, and she relaxed into the chair when she realized that he was only trying to ruffle her feathers.

"Do the Uchiha brothers need to display their clan symbol twenty-four-seven?" he grimaced as he fingered a large banner with the Uchiha crest behind him with disapproval, "It's obnoxious the way it's on everything they own. Can't they just pee in the corner to mark their territory?"

"Said the Nara who is sporting his own clan's graphic." She poked at the Nara clan symbol that looked like a cancel sign on his right deltoid and the man just shrugged, "There is nothing wrong with a little clan pride. Hell, I would be a walking billboard if had a clan name to support. At this point I would be happy to settle for a boyfriend who would let me wear his clan symbol on one of his old Tees. So pipe down. _Captain_."

Shikamaru was about to remark to her tirade when the other ANBU captain entered the office. He realized that she wasn't saying captain to him, but was addressing the Uchiha instead.

"Good evening Captain Nara, to what do I owe the honor?" He placed a large brown bag down on a table next to his window and pulled out a radio from inside his pocket. Tenten took the offered radio with a thanks.

"ANBU business," Shikamaru watched the exchange, distracted by the fact that Itachi had brushed part of his hand against hers in the transfer of goods. "It will only take a moment of your time."

"Certainly, Captain Nara," Tenten smiled suddenly and started to make a hasty retreat. "I will leave you both to your work. Although, I need to explain something to Captain Uchiha before I go."

She motioned him over with a head nod, and bent down to show him the locks. "Just needs a drop of your blood in each hole and the traps will be set. No fuss. They won't go off unless they are related to you by blood."

Itachi kept his eyes on the weapon's specialist the whole time he swiped the tanto off the desk where Tenten had left it and pierced his thumb with the tip of his blade. The man didn't even flinch as the bright red liquid pooled on the pad of his finger before assertively pressing it into each one of the key holes that locked each drawer.

"Was that meant to be a present for Sauske?" she ventured, speaking of the tanto in his hands.

"I should have known better than to leave you in my office alone with such a weapon. It is indeed intended for my brother. It was not foreseen that he would have found the blade prior to this as it is intended to be a surprise for his birthday. It is as Captain Nara would say 'troublesome.'"

"Don't blame you for setting up the traps then. The blade is the finest one I have ever seen. I would be upset, too, if he found that before I gave it to him." Her eyes lingered appreciatively on the blade in his hands. "Thank you, Captain for the radio. I will see myself out."

Another head nod from her Captain and she was almost out the door when Shikamaru called to her, as if remembering something.

"Oh Tenten," he tried to sound official, "I need to speak with you afterwards, the issue concerns you as well. If you don't mind waiting in my office until I have finished speaking to Captain Uchiha."

She nodded and left, leaving Shikamaru with an Uchiha that seemed upset at his very presence.

(o)

"I didn't want you to do my paper work, Tenten. That honestly isn't the reason I needed to see you." Shikamaru spoke with exasperation at the woman organizing the paperwork on his desk. She hadn't even bothered to look up when he entered as she was still in the process of shifting papers around.

"I got bored," she muttered to a paper non-committally, "Besides, you now only have half an hour's worth of paperwork, instead of three. Your welcome." At this she finally smiled up at him as he came around to look at her handiwork from the other side of his desk. "You need to sign these papers," she pointed to a small stack of standard issue forms. "These need to be read by you and looked over," she scooted an equally sized stack of parchment towards him, "And these need to be put in your father's inbox in his office." She leaned back, surveying the desk with passive consideration. She didn't look smug at how well she managed to organize the flow of crap that naturally occurred on his desk.

"What about this stack here?" Shikamaru pointed to another swell of papers sitting on the corner with unbridled innocuousness. He knew those were the ones you had to watch out for. "Where do these go?"

"Morino Ibiki's office downstairs. I figured I would drop them off for you on the way out. What is it that you needed to speak to me about anyways?"

Shikamaru tried not to smile as he spoke his words.

"I want you on my squad. I talked to Captain Uchiha about transferring you over. He told me he would give me an answer after your mission tomorrow provisional upon your performance. I should get an answer by the end of the week."

"Do I have a say in this?" she asked meekly with an intense curiosity.

"No, that is why I wanted to tell you, so you wouldn't think that you did. Transfers are made by ANBU Captains and must be approved by the Hokage. I didn't want you to think it was because your other Captain didn't want you under him. It's just that I do. I could use your skills on my team."

"How very considerate of you," she muttered, spacing out as if mulling it all over in her brain. She got up from her chair with the stack of papers for Ibiki in hand. "Then I will have to actually start calling you _Captain Nara_," she sighed dramatically, to which Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "Anything else, _Captain Nara_?"

"No," he spoke with a note of gratitude for the progress she made on his office duties, "but when you get back, I am treating you to your favorite Chinese place. I owe you for all of your help with my paperwork."

She smiled back at him. "Damn straight you do."

"Get some sleep, you have a hell of a mission in the morning."

"Good night Captain Pineapple Pants."

"Good night Tenten."


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: This next chapter is based on the The Five Love Languages book by Gary Chapman. This is a book I recommend everyone read, although you do not need to read the entire book to understand the concepts in this chapter. The five love languages are: #1Words of Affirmation (example: reviews on FF, saying how proud you are of someone, a post it note saying how wonderful you think someone is, ect.) #2 Quality Time (example: playing scrabble together, bike riding, going fishing, ect.) #3 Recieving Gifts (example: bringing home pizza for dinner, giving jewelry, or any tangible thing to present them with be it small or big) #4 Acts of Service (example: Taking out the trash, vacuuming, sewing a button on their jacket, ect.) #5 Physical Touch (This does not always mean sex. Any kind of touch, be it playing with their hair or cuddling with them on the couch works.) The book goes into depth about variations of these, and how to discover your primary love language. Most people have two, or a primary and a secondary. It is not uncommon to have a three-way tie, either, or just one. I do have a family member that has declared that they needed all five on a regular basis, but they are pretty much crazy so I am not sure if that counts. As long as you get your Love Tank full, and can keep your partner's filled, it really doesn't matter if you are crazy or not. Mazel tov!

(o)

Tenten snaked her way down the hallways, eventually finding herself in the interrogation's office of Morino Ibiki.

"Knock, knock, Sunshine!" she sung out slowly in a low and happy voice as she inched her way into the small office. She always did look forward to the way Ibiki's eyes dilated upon her arrival, even if it was hard to tell because his irises were nearly black to begin with. The man hardly moved, but the twinkle of delight in the man's eyes was unmistakable: he was definitely happy to see her. "I have icky paper work for you," she frowned with a pout. The man behind the desk grunted and returned to signing a scroll in front of him, then offered out a hand for her to place the paperwork in. She did so quietly, and he took the papers after finishing his signature and briefly glanced them over.

"Still doing the Nara's dirty work for him I see," he leaned back in his chair to give her his full attention. She was already filing through a stack of his papers, pulling out random forms. He grabbed her hand, then forcefully reclaimed the papers with a tug and a stern look. "I can bring my own paperwork up to the Hokage's office." She put both hands up in the air letting him know she was now hands-off of all paperwork that led anywhere near Shizune and her department. The smug and knowing look on her face only made the frown on Ibiki's face more defined. "Shut up." He muttered and carefully reorganized the stack, but not without a fait tint of pink on his leathery cheeks.

"You're right," she said coming around his desk and standing behind his chair. She placed her hands on his upper traps and began to knead them between the pads of her fingers and thumbs. Ibiki groaned with relief, letting his head fall forward. "I won't say anything to Shizune, but you know you ought to. I have change for the vending machine that I will leave you. Then when she says that she is hungry and thanks you for the snack, you can tell her that you ordered too much take-out and ask her if she would like to join you in the break room for dinner." Ibiki grunted again as she worked her thumbs in circles alongside each spinous process of his spine.

"How do you know that will work?" He mumbled as his eyes rolled into the back of his head. The guttural sounds he made let her know she was hitting the right spots.

She shrugged,"Because she likes to get stuff. Find a way to get something she likes in her hands at least twice a week for a few weeks to start with. That way she isn't too suspicious. It doesn't have to be expensive. Her favorite candy-bar and some take-out are a good start. We can come up with a list of things to give her later. Take mental notes while she talks to you and that will give you some clues that we can work with. And she loves compliments. Be sure to tell her she looks nice today, or say something like, 'There aren't many women shinobi that look both deadly and feminine in heels, but you pull it off,' or whatever variation or spin you want to put on it."

"And that is going to work?" he asked again with a hint of worry as he peeked one eye open in her direction.

Tenten patted his back, indicating that she was done with his backrub. "If she likes you and she is interested, it will." She smiled warmly at the man. He rolled his shoulders.

"Damn that feels awesome," he grunted his thanks to the kunoichi. "Hey," he asked cautiously as he evaluated the range of motion on his cervical spine. "Think you can take these to your captain for me? I won't have time to grab dinner with Shizune if I get caught talking to anyone for even a few minutes."

"I can take these to Yamanaka-san for you, too." She scooped up another pile of papers in her arms as she gathered the papers for her captain. "Any other outgoing stuff that I can drop off…" she stopped as Ibiki thrust another pile on her.

"These go to Shikamaru, and that should be it. Thanks, Tenten." He rolled a shoulder appreciatively. "For everything," he smiled to show it was sincere. Tenten knew the man could only smile if he truly meant it, anyways. His genuine nature was the quality that she admired the most about the head of the Interrogation's Unit. There was no second guessing his actions at any time. If he wanted you to leave, he would simply tell you to get out of his office. She wished more shinobi would be as forward as he was with his feelings.

She shuffled papers to one arm and dug around in her front pocket. She placed the change on the desk with a wink, "You were getting a snack and the machine gave you the wrong thing." She explained his cover story. "She likes those honey crunch bars on the top row of the vending machine on the third floor. I want details next time I come down here. Got it?" She cocked her head to the side as she waited for a response.

He chuckled appreciatively. "Promise."

"Have a good time," she sung out as she closed the door behind her.

Readjusting her work load, she headed back to Shikamaru's office, only to find that he wasn't there. He was probably dropping stuff off in his father's office and was still talking to him. She dropped off the files in his inbox and headed out to find Yamanaka-san on her way back to Itachi's office.

Why did everyone's office have to be a mile away from each other? Yamanaka was out of his office as well, so she happily placed his designated pile of forms on his desk and headed back up to her captain's office thinking about how nice some decent take-out would be. She had half a mind to join Ibiki in his little dinner date, just so she could get a good list going about what kind of things she liked to help the poor man out. Armed with a bunch of to-go menus of Shizune's favorite places to dine, she knew that Ibiki stood a fighting chance of getting the Hokage's assistant to eat with him tonight. She really hoped that he managed to pull it off and didn't push it off another night.

Poised to knock on her captain's door, her actions remained superfluous as he was already calling her inside by name before she could even touch the door. She found it just a little odd at times that he always knew she was coming from all the way across his office and behind a closed door.

"Sir, my apologies for interrupting," she spoke again with formalities and cleared her throat. She wasn't expecting Sasuke to be there, although she supposed the exponential amount of take-out in the brown bag when Itachi had come back with the radio should have tipped her off that he was going to be joining his brother for dinner, like a regular family. Therapy truly worked miracles for the Uchiha brothers, who now acted as if the atrocities that they had committed not only to their clan and to each other, but to their village and surrounding countries as a whole were all but forgotten. They were completely changed people, who, dare she say, acted normal to each other, or about as normal as two grownup orphaned shinobis could behave within the realm of reason. As much as she hated to admit it, Sasuke still left her a bit uncomfortable at times, but then all she had to do was look at the way he styled his hair like a chicken's ass, and the comfortable medium was achieved as she had to fight a snicker from escaping her lips at the very look of him.

"I just have some paperwork to drop off, Captain," she spoke from the doorway, waiting for him to finish talking with his brother before intruding further into his office.

"Tenten," the younger of the two addressed her and she peered up from the thick papers in hand to look at him, carefully schooling her features as to not laugh directly in the Uchiha's face. She looked at him curiously instead, not bothering to answer back as she might not be able to stop herself from cracking a smile if she unclenched her jaw. "I look forward to you joining our team. Provided my brother is stupid enough to let you transfer out."

"I am confident that whatever decision Captain Uchiha makes will no doubt be the best." She smiled blandly. She had to admit that talk of her getting transferred left an unsettling feeling in the pit of her stomach that Itachi might think her skills to be sub-par and would easily consider a pushing her out. She would hate to get traded off just because she wasn't wanted or needed in his unit. She had just started with ANBU and wanted to get a feel for the team she was assigned to before getting reassigned to another. Not that her opinion mattered. If she got placed in Shikamaru's group there was nothing that she could do about it. She doubted telling Itachi that she wanted another chance to prove herself to stay on his squad would do any good. She didn't have anything against the younger Uchiha either, but somehow the thought of having to work with him on a regular basis left a sour taste in her mouth. Itachi was her captain and having to work with his brother would just remind her that she couldn't live up to meeting Itachi's expectations. She really didn't want to let her first ANBU captain down. She had made it this far, and switching teams would be a travesty in comparison. She would just have to prove herself to Itachi that she was an important component of his unit.

The youngest Uchiha brother smirked at her reply, no doubt thinking that she was either remaining indifferent of the outcome, or possibly sucking up to her captain. Like she cared what anyone who would purposely do that to their hair thought.

"You were saying, Sasuke?" Itachi's neutral intonation seemed spiced with just a hint of irritation. Itachi waved her further inside while they spoke and Tenten snuck in and tried to find a place to put the gobs of paperwork on his now completely covered desk.

"That I can't eat dinner with you. She had an emergency surgery that will be going on the better part of the evening." She ended up right by Itachi's side, trying to casually organize a few things here and there in order to make room for his new papers. It was nice to be in the Uchiha's proximity. With the cool temperature of the room, the excess body heat pouring off the man in waves was a definite welcome. She could just faintly make out the scent of earth and soot from Itachi's clothes. She wondered briefly if he had been outside practicing katon or if he naturally smelled that way.

She reached across the desk to grab at some paperwork that needed to be sent to Ibiki's office. He stopped her from sliding it across the table with a palm placed on the document and a small shake of his head indicating to her that he wasn't done with it yet. She frowned at this, knowing the paper needed to be sent to Ibiki's office right away. He redirected his attention to his brother, still unwilling to relinquish the paper to her.

"Then take some with you. You can eat it with her later. Or eat now and she can have leftovers…"

Sasuke cut him off with a shake of his head, "She hates reheated food, especially after surgery. She doesn't really do leftovers. I will just take her out afterwards." Tenten was uncrumpling a disfigured sheet with a roll of her eyes. Didn't anyone hear of professionalism these days? Upon opening it up further, she noticed that it was dotted with what appeared to be blood and chunks of other substances. She promptly cringed and stopped unfurling the paper and slid it towards her captain. That one was all his, although he didn't look too thrilled to see it either.

With a resigned sigh, Itachi nodded. "I will see if Ibiki is still in his office. He usually stays late," he shifted through his papers as he spoke, trying desperately to make room for the ones that Tenten was about to give him.

"NO!" Tenten nearly shouted beside her captain. Both brothers looked suspiciously at each other before glaring at her like she was a crazy person. "I just came from there," she added quickly, "he ordered too much take-out as well." Well, at least she hoped so. If he hadn't ordered the food by now, then he wasn't going to get around to it.

And as if her insane outcry might possibly be contagious, Sasuke quickly bid his brother good night and left. Tenten tried to follow the man out, but Itachi's call of her name made her turn around and stand at attention to her captain.

"Yes, Sir?" She asked, hoping that the momentary outburst would not be counted against her.

"Are you not friends with Morino Ibiki?" His features were carefully set with his classic passive presence as he reorganized some of the papers she had left on his desk that had come from Ibiki's office. He carefully shifted each paper one by one as he pinned his attention on her. Itachi was not a _terribly_ tall man. Certainly not the _tallest_ man she had ever seen, but the man could posture better than anyone she had ever come across, and when Itachi wanted your full attention, you gave it to him. He seemed incredibly tall at the moment.

"I am, Sir."

"Have you eaten dinner?"

"What?" She didn't understand his line of reasoning, and not wanting to get asked the same question twice, she brained herself and quickly answered, "I mean, no, Sir, I have not."

"Then why did you not eat with him?" One of his eyebrows arched up with the end of the question, and Itachi waited for his answer with all the patience of a trained shinobi.

Defeated, and not wanting to lie to her commanding officer, she sighed. "Permission to speak freely, Sir."

He nodded. "I would prefer it if you would. And stop calling me 'Sir.'"

She swallowed and nodded. Itachi crossed from behind the desk to lean on it from the front. If the move was made deliberately to put more pressure on her in answering his question and to intimidate her, it was definitely working.

"I told Ibiki to ask Shizune to join him for dinner in the break room." Well, honesty might win her points with her current captain, but Ibiki was going to do some damned unimaginable things to her if he were to ever find out she was discussing this with Itachi. Wait, maybe not. They were friends, right? She knew they often ate dinners together. She couldn't imagine how either painfully silent or off-color those conversations must be.

"Well, it's about time he finally made a move."

She was certainly not expecting that to come out of his mouth, but it was nice that he already knew. That saved her from hours of torture by Ibiki, at least. A look of approval graced his visage, and Tenten took a moment to realize how different the two Uchiha men looked in comparison to each other. Sasuke had a more round face, and Itachi's appeared more oval with a distinguished cut jaw-line. There was the issue of height as well, Itachi being the taller and more broad-shouldered of the two men. While their appearances of black hair, pale skin and dark eyes screamed at a familial bond, they were far from someone accidentally mistaking them for twins.

"I've been after him to ask her out for weeks. How did you do it?" He folded his arms across his chest with piqued curiosity. His stance was no longer intimidating. She wondered if she was just starting to get used to the way the man held his presence or if it was something that he changed to make her feel that way. Now he seemed friendly and comfortable, almost a like a warm familiarity. To go from one extreme to the other boggled her completely.

"What makes you think that I had anything to do with him asking her out? I just gave him some money for the vending machine and told him to order extra food." She shrugged. "I am not even sure that he will do it, the big chicken." She muttered the last part mostly to herself. She would give that man no end of crap if he bugged out now.

Itachi let out a low chuckle, the mirth of her last statement spreading across his face. "You might be the only person on the planet to call Ibiki a 'big chicken' and get away with it."

She shrugged her shoulders again. He crossed the room to the table where the large bag of take-out sat. He pulled out a carton of rice and presented it to her. "Apparently,_** I**_ ordered too much."

"Yeah," she smiled taking the box. "Seems to be an epidemic around here."

(O)

A/N: This chapter ran away with me in length and I did not feel that I could reasonably hack it in two and salvage two separate chapters. So that being said, I don't want anyone to think that future chapters are all going to be this long. I also hope the Love Language thing made sense, as it will come to play in more chapters ahead. If you have any questions about Love Languages, feel free to PM and I can clarify anything. Don't be shy.

*JaggedJacket

PS: I almost caught myself adding "That's what she said" after a particular line in this one while proofreading. I restrained myself, however.

And thank you for bringing to my attention that I needed to fix Sasuke's name. Let me know if I got them all!


	4. Chapter 4

"So," she said opening the carton, "Since you bought me dinner, I can help you with your paperwork."

Itachi helped himself to a white box of low mien noodles and shoved some chop sticks in them. "You do not need to do anything to pay me for dinner. After all, you did set those traps for me. I would be throwing most of this out anyways. You just prevented me from feeling guilty about wasting all this food." He took a large bite of the noodles and placed a wary eye on his desk covered completely in hours of sorting and sifting. Tenten could tell he was debating on taking her up on the offer.

"I could cut your workload in half, possibly more." She grabbed some chopsticks out of the bag. "I am just saying I am offering. You don't have to take me up on it if you would prefer to be here all night."

Itachi gave her a skeptical look. "And just what type of magical-red-tape-slashing skills do you posses?"

"I have a system," she walked behind the desk to stand beside him. "Check it out. All of the papers that you need for each office get piled into one place."

"It is better to sort them out by which ones need to be filed first. These documents are all time sensitive." Itachi argued.

"Yes, that is exactly why this system works," she explained picking up papers and tapping them on the desk to keep them neat. "Here, we have a document asking Ibiki if we can use one of his rooms for interrogation in the event that we bring back a prisoner. All this paper requires is a signature. So we put that bad boy on top, and file this one that needs to be filed first, and is significantly more time consuming, underneath it. He will sign this one first, then when he realizes that he can't turn that one in without documenting this last one, it will force him to do the paperwork we need him to do so that it doesn't look like he is just picking and choosing easy paperwork to fill out and then get yelled at by the Hokage for filing them out of chronological order." She smiled as he took it all in.

"That is sneaky and underhanded." He spoke with a near distain. She shrugged a shoulder. They were ninjas, weren't they? Wasn't that part of their job description to use subterfuge and misdirection? Then with sudden amazed awe he added, "That is brilliant, but Ibiki has no doubt figured out your system by now."

"Yeah." This was an easy admission on her part. Everyone was totally on to her, but the other trick up her sleeve is what really pulled off getting the paperwork in with little effort.

"So what makes your system so perfect?" he asked as he put the carton of noodles down the one crumpled piece of paper on his desk, then realizing his error, picked it back up again.

She hesitated. "Well?" he prodded leaning back in his chair. She turned to face him, putting her back to the paperwork-littered desk. He was piercing her with those dark eyes of his again. Her legs, which were the closest thing to him, could pick up his body heat the mere inches away from her he sat. He focused her with that intimidating stare of his, yet she didn't feel as intimidated as she did scrutinized. It was like his eyes were roaming all over her body even as they remained firmly locked with hers. She didn't look away regardless if that is what he intended her to do. She wasn't going to back down because she wanted to be sure that Itachi didn't misunderstand.

"I find out what makes them smile, butter them up, and then hand them their paper work. It moves the process along faster and makes everyone happy."

He leaned further back in his chair and chewed anther bite thoughtfully. "Let me give you an example," she shifted through a packet of papers and snaked out a few for her demonstration. "These would normally go to Shizune. Since I know how much paperwork she receives, when I give her some, I always make sure to have one of her favorite candy bars on hand when I deliver them. I slip in a compliment and suddenly, that paperwork is done before anyone else's."

"Clever," he praised after another moment of contemplation. "That is why you gave Ibiki vending machine money, so he could butter Shizune up before asking her if she wanted to join him for dinner?"

"That man needs all the help he can get," she countered. Itachi nodded in agreement.

"So who else? How do you get Yamanaka to do anything? You would think that man channeled a sloth when it came to paperwork." Itachi dumped the empty carton in the trash as Tenten took another bite of hers. Did he eat that all in three bites? Didn't men have to chew their food, too? She had witnessed Shikamaru eat at the same alarming rate when he splurged for take-out on nights there was no way around cutting the work load down without pulling extra hours late into dinner. She finished the food in her mouth before answering.

"I pretend to check him out," she smiled mischievously, "the man is a classic narcissist. Anything I do to stroke the man's ego and he bends over backward for me." She readjusted the chopsticks in her hands as she theorized her next statement. "I suppose you could just say that you thought you saw one of the other jounin women checking him out or something. Unless you _want_ to hit on him, but he might find that creepy." She suddenly put her hands up defensively, "Unless you swing that way, then I apologize for the creepy comment."

"I most certainly _do not_," he spoke with a stern voice, then stood up. His glare only lasted a split second, the fact that he was a full foot taller than her helped to solidify how adamant he was about his sexual preference. This time she didn't feel intimidated as she did smug about ruffling the Uchiha's feathers. Getting her captain to emote so definitively was somehow fulfilling. She pressed back against the corner of his desk, half sitting, half perched on it. She shrugged her shoulders by way of apology, and Itachi only bothered to arch an eyebrow at her in response. She may have just insulted him by questioning his sexuality, but the payoff was well worth it. He then crossed the room to put distance between them. She busied herself with picking out and eating the vegetables in her container, hiding her smile as he opened a box of rice and composed himself.

"So how did you become friends with Ibiki?" he changed the subject quickly. There was a hidden meaning to what he was saying, she knew. He wanted to know if she was just manipulating the man or if their relationship was actually genuine.

"That man saw right through my crap the moment I walked in the door. I leveled with him about needing to push the paperwork through and we came to a little…arrangement of sorts." Itachi was smiling at the discovery, not bothering to hide his curiosity about the deal the two had struck up. He also beamed with pride at how quickly his friend was able to spot her deception.

"What kind of 'arrangement' did you come to?" He then tipped the box over slightly by way of offering her some as well as showing that its contents were full of rice. She gladly accepted and brought her container over so he could fill it up. A finger bumped up against hers and a part of her wondered if he wasn't suffering from some sort of neuropathy due to his being dead for so long. Surely the Hokage would have fixed that right away, there was no way the man could get away with it being that bad all these years without it compromising his job duties. Was this a recent problem? Was the resurrection jutsu going bad? She knew that was impossible, but a possibly sick ANBU captain worried her all the same. She decided to ignore it and answer his question instead.

"He gets a back rub, I file some stuff for him, and then he pushes the stuff I need through. Simple." She smiled. "Can you pass the soy sauce?"

He dug an arm all the way into the bottom of the bag in search for some. With a furrowed brow, shook his head as he came up empty handed.

"Bummer," she dug around aimlessly with her chopsticks at the sticky rice.

"The break room usually has extra condiments." Itachi offered.

She flashed him a knowing look and smiled, "We need to check up on Mr. Sunshine, anyways."


	5. Chapter 5

"It will look suspicious if we both go," she reasoned as she peered into her carton.

"Too bad," he replied, "I need some hot sauce. I am going with you."

She couldn't tell if he was serious or not, and the two parted the room with their cartons of take-out, trying not to run down the halls like little children going out to recess. Tenten had to admit that the anticipation was built up so much she wanted to burst when she entered the room first and saw the two conversing politely with each other.

Shizune was curled up on a chair sipping tea out of a mug and Ibiki was on the floor across from her with Tonton in his lap. The pig looked like it was asleep or in a deep state of relaxation as Ibiki stroked between its eyes and down its snout in slow, soothing motions. White cartons of take-out containers lay in various stages of emptiness all over the table. The man had seriously gone overboard on the "I ordered too much" excuse.

Tenten involuntarily shivered as she headed towards the cabinets and drawers next to the toaster. Seriously, it was beginning to annoy her that no one had the common sense to heat the freaking building this late into the season. Was there some master control somewhere that someone was neglecting? She would have to inquire about this to her captain later. Itachi had stopped to make small talk with the two, standing behind Shizune as Tenten foraged through drawers looking for any packet of soy sauce that didn't look petrified or stuck to the bottom of a drawer. With the toaster, that served more as a decorative piece of equipment as it hadn't worked since as long as she could remember, she could see everyone in its reflection unbeknownst to them. Perfect. She continued her search as she kept an eye on the conversation.

Shizune shifted in her chair to see Itachi, and that was when Ibiki winked at him. That definitely meant things were going well! The weird part was, as her hand came in contact with a sticky substance on the handle of the bottom drawer, that when Shizune turned back to face Ibiki, _Itachi winked back._ It wasn't one of those _hey nice work_ guy-type of winks either. It was a conspiratorially given wink, as if they were both in cahoots with each other! What the hell were they both planning? She shifted to the refrigerator to see if someone had left a bottle of soy sauce in the door. There were a few questionable things lying at the bottom and among them was a half gone bottle of something she hoped was soy sauce. The part of the label that was not torn off had been crusted over by the contents of the bottle no doubt spilling over it. On the plus side, there was a bottle of hot sauce that looked relatively new sitting in the door with other random condiments. As she inspected the bottle, she noticed that it had been barely used and that it didn't expire for another couple of months. It looked like Itachi had lucked out in the hot sauce department.

That still left her with the soy sauce that looked like it might land her in the emergency room if she consumed it. She washed off the bottle in the sink and dumped some of it her box of food anyways. On the plus side, the stuff didn't pour out in chunks, or look syrupy. She replaced the bottle of what was hopefully soy sauce in the door of the fridge and grabbed the bottle of hot sauce for her captain. She tossed it over to Itachi, who nodded his thanks and left the room quickly.

That meant that she should high tail it out of there as soon as possible. She took a hesitant bite of her food and nearly gagged. She spat the tainted rice back into the box and then dropped it into the nearby trashcan.

Ibiki, who no doubt had witnessed her distress, decided to add to her frustration by giving a low chuckle at her misfortune.

"I take it that wasn't what you wanted to put on your food." Even Shizune had sat up to watch her scrub her tongue with her nails under the running water of the sink.

"I think that was someone's idea of a joke," Tenten managed to speak in between gargles, "or an experiment gone wrong," she muttered darkly. She turned the water off as she heard both shinobi laugh at her expense. She rummaged the drawers again, remembering that she saw mints in one of the corners when she was hunting for some soy sauce packets. Opening five and shoving them unceremoniously into her mouth, she chewed a few up and swallowed, then kept a few in her mouth to help scour the lingering taste of foot out of her mouth. Satisfied that she could no longer taste the vile contents of the container in the fridge, she vowed that no one should be subject to that kind of hell and promptly disposed of the fetid bottle.

Bidding the two good night over their continued sniggers, she left the break room no worse for wear in spirits. Ibiki and Shizune seemed to be having a good time, relaxing in each other's company. A smug smile formed on her face as she walked down the halls and sucked on her mints.

Despite the small unfortuitous mishap concerning her dinner, the evening wasn't a complete wash. Although her appetite was now completely lost, she was going to bid Itachi good night and head home and get some sleep. She reached his room and knocked on the frame as the door was open.

"Hey, Captain, I am going to head out. Thanks for dinner." She entered as he waved her in.

"Leaving so soon?" he asked casually as he poured over a document with a furrowed brow.

"I can take some stuff down to Shikamaru's office for you when I go, it's on my way out," she snuck around his desk to grab the papers.

"That is quite alright," he tried to pull the papers away, once again brushing a finger over hers. She really ought to get him to talk about that some time. Her upcoming mission with him became more and more worrisome.

"Hey, you bought dinner, it's the least I can do," she smiled at him and grasped the papers more forcefully. With sigh, he relinquished the papers and leaned back in his chair.

"Far be it from me not to accept help at this late hour," he resigned with a smile.

"Good night, Captain. See you at O'dark-thirty tomorrow morning," she called from the doorway as she left.

"Don't remind me," he called out sourly.

It was getting late, she realized as she passed a hall clock on the way to Shikamaru's office. Really his office was about three times the size of a standard broom closet, but she didn't hear Shikamaru complain about its size once. She liked that he wasn't petty about things like that and tried to think positively about her switching to his team.

"Hey, you are back," she handed the papers over to him with a smile, "and _now_ I am going to go home."

Shikamaru frowned as he got up from behind his desk. She contemplated exactly which ANBU captain was taller than the other one inside her head for just a moment. Shikamaru was definitely lankier by far. The man had an impossibly long back that coupled the length in his arms and legs well. His slouched shoulders did nothing for his posture, however. Her captain, on the other hand, stood with sinewy confidence despite his mostly passive countenance. They had to be the same height, she reasoned suddenly as Shikamaru was towering over her. When did he slip past his desk? How could she not notice that he was cornering her with that tall frame of his?

She backed into the wall as he continued to close the space between them. Why was he smirking? Was that determination she saw in his eyes? She didn't realize his purpose until it was too late. His lips were covering hers as his long arms grabbed her waist to pull her up to his height so he wouldn't have to crane his neck so far to kiss her. The whole thing took her completely by surprise she didn't even know if she reacted or just stood there like a dead fish. It wasn't a long kiss, and the confusion on her face when they parted must have been amusing to the Nara ANBU captain. He gently caressed the side of her face and then slid a thumb along her bottom lip, no doubt now swollen from where he pressed so fervently against her. She had never been taken so unawares with a kiss before. She always knew when they were coming, because she always had some kind of inclination that a guy liked her before they made their move.

"Get some sleep, we can talk about this later," he whispered to her. She nodded and closed the door behind her. She walked slowly down the halls, as if in a trance. How did she miss the signs that he liked her? Was that the real reason that he wanted her on his team? To spend more time with her? All those late nights where he used paperwork as an excuse for her to stay late! She could have kicked herself for not seeing the signs sooner! Did the ANBU captain and heir to the Nara clan actually like her? How on earth did _that_ blindside her?

Mentally, she couldn't help but think, "What the hell just happened?"


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Morphy-chan, I wrote this chapter just for you. Enjoy.

(i)

She opened the door to Shikamaru's office without bothering to knock on the door, which caught the Nara heir a bit off guard.

"You are such an asshole!" If opening the ANBU captain's door without permission had him floundering, the kunai that he had to dodge that showed her just the right amount of fear in his eyes had him reeling.

"You didn't think I would find out?" She didn't raise her voice much as he dug the kunai out of the wall and quickly covered the divot with a pushpin and a paper. He looked mildly irritated at the sudden outburst.

"Tenten, I can explain," the man replied with a cross expression. She folded her arms across her chest and didn't wait for him to continue.

"Your father thinks that we are dating! You want to date me just so you can get out of some arranged marriage? You have got to be out of your tree!" Her tone was more riddled with disappointment than anger. If she had known that was what he wanted she would have gladly played along for a little while. "You didn't have to lie to me. You could have just asked, dumbass. You know I would have said yes. But to kiss me and get my hopes up?"

"What do you mean 'hopes up?'" the man crossed from behind his desk to her side with a suddenly scared and concerned expression on his face.

"Not like that," she explained to his relief, "I wasn't crushing on you or anything. I just thought that if you, the heir to the Nara clan would be able to see me as worthy of dating, then maybe I might have a shot at being a part of a clan one day."

"I was going to tell you," he sighed with repentance, "My dad is pressuring me into a relationship. I thought that maybe my best friend," she interrupted with a raised eyebrow, "_my best friend that is a girl_," he amended quickly, "might be able to fall for a guy like me. I wouldn't have to look for a girl to put up with me, my dad gets appeased, and we fall in love and get married. You get the clan you always wanted. Everyone wins."

"Except?"

"Except we aren't in love. I thought maybe kissing you might spark something. I was wrong. Sorry."

"You are such a lazyass." Tenten kicked his leg playfully, "I bet you told this whole big speech to your dad about me transferring to your team to spend more time with me, and that you took me out on dates whenever you could while we were out on missions just so you wouldn't have to do it here in town." He patted the back of his neck sheepishly with an open palm. She was totally on to him.

"He wasn't really all that thrilled with my choice of you," he commented quietly. "Thinks that I won't contribute enough to our relationship and that you will eventually dump me because I am too lazy to put any real effort in it. The man knows me too well. It's true. I would get too comfortable and you would end up miserable or leaving me. I thought this through already."

"Well, at least the man didn't want us dating because of the whole clanless thing. I should be touched the man actually cares."

"I wouldn't say _that_," his tone changed, obviously the whole orphan part _was_ pinioned against her.

"Awesome," she sunk into the sole chair in his office with defeat. "Does your mom hate me, too?"

"No, she found the whole idea of us dating thrilling," he commented with a shoulder shrug, she perked up upon hearing these words. At least someone liked her. "Of course you could have a clubbed leg and be toothless for all she cares. She just wants grandkids."

Deflating, she rolled her head back onto the back of the chair, "You are doing wonders for my self-esteem."

"Sorry," he sincerely apologized. He shifted closer to her, hesitantly speaking as he petitioned her. "There is one more thing."

She looked up at her friend. "I will go along with this whole stupid thing, Shikamaru, you don't have to ask. I know you aren't ready to get married."

"That is not what I was going to say, but I really do appreciate you going along with all of this. I rerouted some papers that are urgent and my dad should be delivering them down here any minute. I need him to catch us…" he patted the back of his neck again and averted his gaze. He couldn't complete his sentence.

She was instantly alert and sitting up straight in the chair. "What, Nara? You need your dad to catch us doing _what_ exactly?"

"I overheard him talking to Morino Ibiki earlier today. Ibiki nearly swallowed his chopsticks when my dad told him we were together. Ibiki said he would have known if you were in a relationship with me. So my dad…."

"Thinks your story is bullshit, _which it is by the way_. Ibiki is going to be pissed when he finds out. Do you have any idea what kind of hell I am going to get from that man?" She was now standing up pointing a finger threateningly to his chest.

"Easy, you can tell Morino, just make him swear he won't let it get back to my father." Shikamaru took the finger that she was driving into his chest with his fist and held it affectionately to his heart as he patted the back of her hand. His beady little eyes were pleading desperately for her to comply.

"Please, just this once, I won't ask anything after that. No family dinners, no meeting parents. Just let him catch me with my hands all over you and I am pretty sure that will appease him." He leaned in towards her, pulling her to him to slowly press a kiss against her. She placed a finger over his waiting lips.

"I got a better idea. It does involve us making out. Just follow my lead." She craned her neck to kiss him, and he eagerly accepted the offer. He placed his hands hesitantly around her hips as he deepened the kiss. She broke it off prematurely.

"You have _got_ to do better than that. I only want to have to do this _once_. No taking off any clothes, that is the only rule. When I say separate we have to make it look like we _weren't_ just making out. Got it?"

A smile spread across his face as he leaned in to kiss down the side of her throat. She used the time that he trailed kisses along her neck to shift his weapon's pouch so she could gain better access to his ass. When he straightened up with a near yelp, she smugly smiled and whispered with a tease in his ear, "Come on, Shikamaru, five minutes of fun, you can handle that."

With a grunt he shifted his hands around to _her _ass and hauled her up as if to show her that he was onboard. Their kissing soon became hot and fierce, as if they were both taking full advantage of the fact that this was the only time they would be doing this.

"If I didn't know for sure that it would completely ruin our friendship," he rasped against the shell of her ear right before he licked it, "I would totally suggest us being friends with benefits."

Her hands untucked his shirt and she let her hands roam all over his chest as she kissed him harder, letting her teeth nibble on his lower lip aggressively, "You wouldn't be able to handle me."

As if that were some kind of challenge, his hands shifted under her top and over the front of her bra. As his tongue glided against hers, her thoughts shifted to last night where she slept against her ANBU captain.

Her team was caught in a storm, blowing icy sheets of pure unadulterated misery down upon them relentlessly. They made little progress as they passed through the worst of it, Itachi eventually ordering everyone to strip down to their skivvies just before sundown and follow him into his tent. When the team glared at each other in nervous hesitation upon the order to join their leader, Itachi asked if they would rather die of hypothermia and be shy, or do as he told them so they could all share body heat and possibly live to see the gates of Konoha again.

Of course then men on her team just shrugged and threw their wet clothes in a pile outside the tent. Tenten, the only female, was the last to enter. Thankfully Itachi threw a warm blanket around her right away and ordered her to the side of the tent where he would be sleeping.

She marveled at how there was just enough room for all four of them to sleep inside, and then noted the Uchiha symbol emblazed on the sides of the front and back panels of the canvass as the wind threatened to snap the tent like a twig. Itachi had quickly gone over what was expected of them, how they would sleep during the duration of the storm and ride it out for the night.

They all settled close, her back against her Captain and her front facing a comrade, who looked frightened to get close enough to her to share his body heat for some reason. She had half a mind to tell him to stop being a baby, but decided against it and just scooted closer to Itachi instead, who seemed to have an overabundance of warmth. She rubbed her frigid hands together, trying to blow chakra into them to warm them up. That is when her captain took over the job, rubbing them gently and letting them sit inside his fists when he was too sleepy to perform the task any more. When she tried to suppress a shiver unsuccessfully and her teeth began to chatter, he pulled her closer to him and wrapped the blanket around them tighter. She had never slept so peacefully in her life.

The feel of Itachi's muscles and sinewy hold on her throughout the night came flooding into her mind as Shikamaru pushed her up against the wall to gain leverage and work his height to his advantage. His kisses were passionate and almost desperate, and she had a feeling that the man truly had been pent up for a while and was in need of a release. She contemplated his statement about being friends with benefits and decided that they couldn't do that to each other, he was definitely right on that front, even if it would be fun for a while before it all fell apart.

"Your dad is coming, we need to stop."

Very reluctantly, and getting in just a few more feels and kisses, he finally released her with a shaky breath.

"Get behind the desk, try to make it look like we weren't doing anything." He gave her a look as if she were no longer lucid. "Trust me, if your dad is as smart as I think he is, this will work."

Shikamaru adjusted his pants before sitting down, and she couldn't help but smile at how very uncomfortable he was going to be until he _could_ find his release. She handed him a file as his door swung open and his father entered with a scowl on his face. Apparently she wasn't the only one that wasn't keen on knocking on Shikamaru's door that day.

Tenten and Shikamaru had feigned nonchalance so well that it took several seconds of Shikaku's eyes raking over them before he finally came to the conclusion that he had almost walked in on them.

"Good evening, Father," Shikamaru greeted without bothering to stand up from behind his desk. He briefly glanced at the folder that Tenten was handing him as she tried to surreptitiously swipe at the excess saliva around her mouth.

Tenten finally faced him and offered him a smile to try and hide her embarrassment. After perusing through the folder and pulling out a few pages of a file, Shikamaru glanced up once more, "Is there something that I can help you with?"

The Nara clan leader cleared his throat and scowled deeper, confirming Tenten's evaluation that the man had just figured out what they had been doing moments ago before he entered the room, which was ten times better than getting caught making out like teenagers. Making it look like they were trying to hind it made it more believable that they were really seeing each other. Getting caught only made it look like they were _trying_ to get caught, and Shikaku would see right through it.

"Just some paperwork for you to fill out is all," he didn't even bother looking at his son when he spoke and handed him the file. He just continued to give the disheveled kunoichi in his office a disapproving glare and then left with a nod to his son by way of saying good night.

As soon as the door was shut, Tenten nearly shouted at Shikamaru, causing him to instinctively cover both of his hands over his ears. "I thought you said you told him about us?"

"Keep it down, woman!" he shouted almost as loud back at her, "do you want him to hear you!"

"Why didn't you tell him about us! What? Are you ashamed to be with me?"

"What? Of course not! I did tell him! It's not my fault if he…" Shikamaru trailed off. Tenten gave him a thumbs up for leaving it wide open.

"If he _what_, Shikamaru?" She pressed and rolled her wrist to tell him to continue.

"Look, he comes from a long line of Naras who would do anything to protect their clan. Without knowing what kind of genetic history you posses, it threatens to dominate over the family's jutsu. He just wants to preserve the clan's abilities by keeping the line pure. You have to understand, Ten, it's nothing personal."

His words stung her like a slap to the face. Shikamaru knew he had crossed a line, the truth hurt, weather they were doing it for show or not. She hadn't expected him to just come right out and say it.

"But I don't have any special jutsus, Shikamaru," she pleaded, and somehow she wasn't sure if she was trying to convince Shikaku or someone else that she was worth looking at to be a potential clan bride. "No fancy DNA that is going to interfere with any bloodlimit. I swear!" Shikamaru had momentarily forgot about his restricting pants problem to come around the front of the desk to comfort her. She could tell he didn't expect her to get that emotional about the whole ordeal. He cocked his head to the side, concern written all over his face as he tried to take her hand in his.

"There is a slight chance that you are a carrier, that it might overpower the shadow jutsu." She wouldn't let him hold her hand, despite her need to be comforted.

Tears stung her eyes without her permission, and she wept that she might never be loved simply because she didn't have show dog papers saying that she wasn't a mutt. It was all too unfair.

"But that doesn't mean that I don't love you," Shikamaru meant it seriously as a friend, and Tenten couldn't help but appreciate the man's honesty.

She smiled as she wiped tears off of her cheeks. "It just means that I could seriously screw up your lineage. What father would want that for his only son?"

"The chances are so slim," he explained to her, to try to comfort her, and only half of her wanted to hear it, "we wouldn't know until we had kids."

"By then it would be too late," she spoke breathlessly. There was a pregnant pause. "I am going to save Shikaku from assassinating me in my sleep in ten years. Ending it now will be easier than him trying to make it look like an accident."

"Tenten, please, it doesn't have to be that way," Shikamaru pleaded earnestly. She could tell he was being serious and that it wasn't just a show for his father to overhear. Somehow, it didn't matter.

"No. I won't ruin this." Her voice found new determination. "Not for your clan, not for your father," she paused with a ragged breath, "not for you."

His eyes were searching hers, full of concern and noticeably wondering if she was okay. She shrugged indifferently and wiped more of the salt streaks from her face.

She stormed out, making sure to wipe her eyes as she bumped into Shikaku who had lingered in the hallway as expected.

"Your clan's jutsu is safe," she muttered as she tore down the halls to Ibiki's office, not realizing that she would get so worked up over something like this. Shikamaru poked his head out of his office.

"Tenten wait!" He yelled down the hall. She could faintly hear his father stepping in to tell him to let her go.

Well, at least that had gone over well. Shikaku being the nice father that he was, would allow Shikamaru some time before pressuring him into another relationship.

That, and she might let some rumors spread about how vindictive she would be if he found another girlfriend so quickly.

Shikamaru totally owed her one.


	7. Chapter 7

She didn't do a great job of composing herself as she walked up to Ibiki's office door, only pressing a shoulder to her cheeks to get rid of any access flow from the unintentional emotional rollercoaster she just endured. She needed a friend, and Ibiki was as good as any. She wiped more tears from her cheeks as she realized that dealing with a crying female might be a little too much for him to handle. She decided that she needed a distraction, and suddenly the thought of helping Ibiki with a shit ton of paperwork seemed wholeheartedly appealing.

Man, she really was losing it.

She knocked on the door. The gruff answer for her to come in had her hesitantly peeking inside. Ibiki only briefly looked up from his paper work to acknowledge her before ducking back down and reviling another scroll. When it dawned on him that Tenten was not quite her cheerful self, he immediately became concerned and brushed aside what he was working on in order to figure out what had the Weapon's Mistress of Konoha suddenly looking in the doldrums.

"Come in already," he ordered, "shut the door behind you."

Tenten nodded and pushed the door closed until it clicked behind her. Her demure nature was not something that the man was at all used to. A perky, more vibrant version of herself was what usually came through the door.

"Sorry," she apologized as she second guessed herself, "I didn't mean to bother you."

Ibiki narrowed his eyes on her puffy eyes,"If that Shithead Nara made you cry, I swear on every scar I posses that I am going to give that man twice as many," he growled through gritted teeth.

A large part of her wanted to ask to which Shithead Nara he was referring to, but didn't. Instead, she reassured him, "I'm fine, I just need to get my mind off of some things. Got any paperwork for me to do?"

The head of the Interrogation Unit leaned back in his chair and evaluated her by looking her over with long glance and an eyebrow raise. "If you are asking to help with paperwork, then it has got to be bad."

Tenten shrugged with defeated casualness. She would get over it, all of what Shikamaru said, eventually.

"I just need a distraction, is all. Got anything that I could drop off for you?" Tenten peeked over into a file and began to amble through it.

Ibiki slapped a hand on top of the folder and pulled it out of her reach. "Are you going to tell me about Shikamaru?"

She shrugged again, "What's to tell? He wanted me to pretend to date him so his father wouldn't pressure him into a relationship he didn't want. We staged a fight after we got caught making out where after Shikamaru explained to me why he could never get involved seriously with someone like me." She tried to lean over his desk to pull out a few pages of a file that might need to be delivered tonight, "Pretty boring stuff, actually."

"Is that why you were crying?" the man didn't pull any punches, "Or did you actually fall for Shikamaru and he broke your heart?" She rolled her eyes.

"I am not in love with Shikamaru any more than I am with Lee, or Gai, or Neji, or you. I apparently am the one exception to the rule that guys and girls cannot be friends without there being some weird sexual thing between them. So you can be rest assured that there are no guys out there thinking that I am something other than an average kunoichi without a clan affiliation." She hadn't meant to get so worked up about it, but somehow she was shouting her last statement, and pointing a kunai at no one in particular. Ibiki allowed her a few moments to compose herself before shifting back in his seat for a second round of questions.

"What did he say?" he demanded in a soothing tone. It was hard to go against his line of questioning that had twenty plus years of training behind it. He waited patiently for her to answer with his arms powerfully crossed over his chest to try and hide how upset he was that someone had hurt her. Tenten was kind of like a sister to him, and he couldn't help but want to peel the flesh off of anyone that hurt her. He was a bit over-protective like that.

"Just something about not my DNA being unreliable. The clan's jutsu could be overpowered by some recessive gene of mine and that would end the Nara line forever, or something like that," she tried to look disinterested in what she was saying by not meeting his gaze and rummaging through the mug on his desk full of pens. His eyes, however, never left her as he was analyzing her body posture and facial features to measure just how much pain he was going to have to inflict on some shadow users to help him sleep better that night.

"It would just mean that you were stronger than them if your technique overpowered theirs." He calculated with piercing eyes at the female pretending to find interest in a random pen just so she didn't have to look him in the eye and let her looks give her completely away.

"Somehow, that doesn't make me feel any less lonely," she sighed, "not that it matters." After only a few seconds of a pause for reflection on this, she added, "Hey, you wouldn't mind spreading a vicious rumor for me, would you?"

(i)

She was going to knock on the door, but somehow she knew that if she just stood there for a second, she would just get asked to enter instead. A count down in her head told her exactly when the call should be coming from the other side, but no consent was given to enter. She knocked on the door.

Mr. Captain Uchiha was apparently not in. Pushing the office door open, she resolved to quickly slap her captain's desk with more paper work and possibly resolve her problem with some well deserved alcohol. Every shinobi had their vice, it was about time she found one that didn't involve polishing steel until the wee hours of the morning and did something more productive like puking her guts out after getting completely hammered.

Now that she had thought that through and the whole cycle of drinking, vomiting and getting a headache the next morning came more into focus, she decided that not doing it alone would at least make the experience less detestable. She pushed the door open ajar, letting the harsh light from the hall way spill in orange and yellow lines across the bland blue carpeting. She threw the papers and files on his desk haphazardly, then immediately followed behind his desk where the ornamental banner of the Uchiha crest hung proudly behind it. Her fingers traced the outline of the fan with its bright colors and the pads of her fingers somehow rubbed the end of the banner as she fell into contemplative silence.

Even though she felt the chakra signature grow closer and the light that fell in contrast was covered up by the shadow of a tall man, she couldn't bring herself to turn around just yet.

"Ten, I'm sorry," the ANBU captain tried to console the uninterested kunoichi.

"Did your dad buy it?" She asked quietly. Shikamaru was right behind her now, putting a hand on her shoulder to try and make ammends.

"Yeah. You're a good friend Tenten. Not many people would pretend to my girlfriend just to help me out." The hand on her shoulder gave a gentle squeeze.

"Yeah, yeah," she said unenthusiastically, "Just be sure to avoid Ibiki for a while. Unless you have a death wish. That man thinks you made me cry. You are on top of his shit list."

She finally turned to face him. "So do I get to stay on my team? Or did the paperwork go through and I am stuck with Neji again for the rest of my ANBU career?"

"It wouldn't be _that_ bad being on my team, Tenten." He scowled as if he was suddenly affronted.

"Maybe," she shrugged. "But I am growing attached to _my_ team. I just don't want to have to switch, it just wouldn't feel right." She still wouldn't look him in the eye. Her focus was on the symbol on his sleeve. "So did you transfer me out, Captain?" Her eyes finally hit on the Uchiha leaning on the doorway with passive grace that somehow let her know he was not pleased, though she couldn't put her finger on as to why. Perhaps her performance was subpar and the disappointment came from having to explain to her that he was no longer her captain. She looked headlong at the silhouette of the once fallen Uchiha. There was always a certain countenance that he possessed, something masculine, deadly, passive, haunting, and mysterious. The dark eyed Uchiha just glared at Shikamaru, who suddenly dropped his hand away from her, cleared his throat and put some distance between them.

"Captain Nara," Itachi announced from the doorway tonelessly, "If you wouldn't mind, I would like to talk to Tenten alone."

Shikamaru ducked out quickly with a mumbled farewell, leaving them alone as he closed the door behind them. As if able to see in the dark, Itachi walked over to the lamp in the far corner of his office and clicked it on. The soft light only provided enough light to illuminate the corner of the room where the desk resided, and she was grateful that the harsh overhead light wasn't on at the moment. The room seemed peaceful in the face of her inner turmoil, and she was sure that the Uchiha walking closer to her was helping the effect. He gave her a rushing feeling, yet she felt incredibly safe and comforted by his mere presence. Her heart raced as he stepped in front of her, sharing body heat by approximation. The heady, smoky masculine scent plugged her nose and didn't seem to help that dizzying feeling that suddenly came upon her when he was around her. The smell reminded her faintly of walking past the laundry mat when all of the fabric softners would combine and mix in the air. It was a pleasant smell that blended with the campfire scent that seemed imbedded on his very skin. She didn't think she would ever be able to get used to it, it was so addicting.

"Ibiki keeps me pretty well informed." There was a hesitancy in his voice that she had never heard from the confidant Uchiha. She let her eyes focus on his face and how his uneven bangs fell around the contours of his jaw. He swallowed and she couldn't help but think that his anterior neck was decidedly sexy when he did that, especially when the muscles were extenuated by the light of the lamp in the corner.

Then she did the unthinkable and let her eyes fall directly into his, a huge mistake for her whether he was activating the Sharingan or not. The tarry black pulled her in as she locked her stare with his. She couldn't deny that she thought he was incredibly handsome. Well, anyone with eyes would have to admit that, she was certain.

"I won't tell Shikaku, and for the record," he let his hand fall to her shoulder, brushing the sleeve with his hands as he slid it down her arm, "Nara would be a fool to pass you up."

She scoffed and turned her back to him. She could feel him against her back like she had last night, the amazing warmth so enticing she had to remind herself not to step backwards to be nearer to it. She eyed the banner on the wall again and let a finger fall over the edge of the emblem one last time.

"You don't have to try and make me feel better just because you transferred me off of your team. I'm a big girl, I can handle it."

"You are a talented kunoichi and a valuable member of my team. There was no chance that I would let Nara steal you from me." Even though there was nothing but conviction in his voice, she still had a hard time believing him. He took a step closer, the warmth melting her better judgment and she thought there might have been a bit of possessiveness in the way he spoke.

She took a shaky breath, but it was hard to stabilize her thoughts while he placed hot hands on her shoulders. "I always thought that some things in life didn't matter. I suppose any clan wouldn't want someone like me. Just doesn't seem fair." Her voice trailed off into a whisper.

"There are some people that would think that no clan affiliation is a bad thing. Idiots to be sure." He was going to continue, but she had to interrupt him there.

"Said the handsome clan leader. You could get _anyone_ Itachi. I know you mean well, but it is different standing in my shoes. Can you honestly say that you would consider even dating someone without a proper lineage?" She brazenly turned to look at him, searching for an answer in the dark well of his eyes. Her sadness was replaced with a bit of harsh anger, and she knew that taking it out on her captain really wasn't the best way to deal with her problem. She quickly realized her mistake and backtracked. "My apologies, Captain. My frustrations do not lie with you." She bowed her head to show remorse, hoping that he wouldn't be caustic in his retort to her. Perhaps she had crossed that personal/professional line that seemed to be getting more and more blurred as she spent time with him. Just knowing that she could never be with someone like him left her bereft. She didn't need another Neji or Lee or Ibiki.

"I can honestly say," Itachi began slowly, deliberately inching himself closer to her, "that I have broken two regulation radios and bribed a clerk to go home early just to try and spend more time with someone that doesn't even have a surname."

"What?" Tenten asked bewildered as her head shot up and Itachi let his forehead fall on top of hers, closing his eyes and taking her shoulders up again with both hands.

"Last night, when you fell asleep in my arms, it was the best sleep that I have ever gotten, dead or alive." His breath rasped against her cheeks, and she could feel the desperate plea in his voice. The Uchiha Itachi was out on a limb, extremely exposed, all because of her.

She reached for his hand, holding it up by the wrist and spreading open his fingers with the other. She ghosted the tips of her fingers on the pads of his, taking in every sensation from the hundreds of nerve endings located there. "Can you feel that?"

It was his turn to let out a shaky breath. "Yes."

"Thank Kami," she spoke with relief, "I thought you had gotten neuropathy in your extremities." She hugged him at the joyous thought that he was not dying or getting sick. He was alive, whole, and interested in her. _The_ Uchiha Itachi was interested in _her_. She tried to wrap her brain around the fact that someone with all the lethality of an army and who wanted to rebuild their once prominent clan was making excuses just to be with her. It was just a little overwhelming and a touch flattering.

"I might actually kill my brother after all," he muttered as he reluctantly broke their hug and focused his attention on the door where the other member of the Uchiha clan entered.

"Aniki," the younger brother rushed, "Ibiki's snapped, he's got Shikamaru in a choke hold in his office. You might want to break it up before someone dies."

There was a pregnant pause where Itachi just stayed stationary while Sasuke and Tenten moved to go help the other ANBU captain. At the doorway, they turned around only to witness Itachi having a battle with himself over whether or not he was going to help Shikamaru or whether he was going to help Ibiki. The internal struggle was cut short by Tenten winking at him and motioning him to follow them. Sasuke left them half way down the hall half shouting some excuse to get his girlfriend to help in the aftermath as he trailed away from them, and Tenten could only think to herself that the less witnesses there were at the moment, the better.

A/N: I know that was a crappy place to leave off. This chapter was getting too long. I also apologize for this taking so long to update, as well as any updates on The Rundown. I just got another job on top of my existing job, and my already crazy life. Although, I do have to say that the job I took I completely love, and it makes me appreciate going there as opposed to my other job which is compete hell.

That being said, I hope you all enjoyed this! One more chapter and I believe that will conclude this little fic.

Cheers!

jaggedjacket


	8. Chapter 8

"Come on," Tenten tugged the Uchiha's hand to follow her, letting her hand become overwhelmed by the hot sensation he held over her. Itachi seemed to stiffen almost imperceptibly and he stated his next sentence non-committaly as if he had a dry throat.

"Are we going to help Shikamaru?" The hesitation was adorable, and Tenten only smiled back at him in return before answering with a mischievous grin.

"Nah, we're gunna watch." At that he picked up the pace, a smirk on the corner of his mouth that made the mostly passive Uchiha seem anything but.

The door to Captain Nara's office was open. A large, thick, tan man held the lankier one in what Sauske promised was a choke hold, and a damn good one at that. Ibiki was letting just enough blood to Shikamaru's head that he wouldn't pass out, and had a hand holding one of his arms so that he couldn't form seals. A blue vein was pulsing madly on Shikamaru's forehead as he sputtered for what little oxygen he was allotted with a red face. His other arm that wasn't pinned behind his back was pulling down just enough on Ibiki's forearm to allow a small amount of air to pass in gulps as he struggled against the seasoned man.

Ibiki didn't let him up right away when they stepped in the doorway and they nonchalantly leaned against the frame and peered in on the action as if it were an everyday occurrence. Ibiki had the grace to look as if he had just gotten caught with his hands in the cookie jar, but didn't care enough to even let go of his grip on the Nara heir even a hair's width.

"Don't mind us," Tenten waved a hand casually, "We are just here to watch."

Shikamaru sputtered with a grunt at the thought that his would-be saviors had the audacity to lounge about like it was some form of entertainment instead of intervening like he was hoping for.

To Tenten, that was exactly what it was, well that and paybacks. Not that she was intentionally malicious or held a grudge or anything, but far be it from her to tell others not to. She smiled to Ibiki in turn at her words. "Carry on."

Itachi seemed to be pleased with this outcome and the Uchiha and the Head of the Interrogation's Unit exchanged some kind of guy look that expressed a non-verbal communication that seemed to translate into more pain on Shikamaru's part. Alarm suddenly jolted up through the party, except Shikamaru who was already at maximum panic levels, and Ibiki let go of the shadow user and patted him hard on the back saying louder than he ought, "Spit it out! Breathe man!" And the man acted like he had just given Shikamaru the Heimlich maneuver when Shizune walked in parting Itachi and Tenten as she made her way to the sputtering ninja.

Shikamaru lay on all fours, forcing air back into his lungs as the color finally drained from his face. Shizune, ever the vigilant medic-nin, crouched down to his level to evaluate the man with a critical eye.

"I really thought there would be more blood," remarked the youngest Uchiha who appeared between Tenten and Itachi, apparently crestfallen that Ibiki had not delivered on the gore that he had been rumored and notorious for.

"If you want to see some blood, just go rummaging through your brothers desk again." Tenten drawled as she picked at some dirt underneath her nails, then turned a stern look to Itachi, "And like I said before, I am not cleaning that mess up."

Sauske's eye brows furrowed at the strange conversation that had just taken place, his disappointment in the lack of violence was displeasing, so he decided to bid everyone farewell and try again to find his girlfriend again instead of just the nearest medic-nin.

"You can't say he didn't get warned now," Tenten explained to Itachi, who only scoffed at the notion of his little brother paying any heed to her ominous musings.

Shikamaru was now able to talk, and the genius in him was smart enough not to tattle on Ibiki in front of his new girlfriend.

"I was choking," he gasped when he was able to. "If it weren't for him, I wouldn't be breathing right now." Tenten had to laugh at the almost truth of that statement.

But as Shizune turned her face to the supposed hero, Shikamaru mouthed "asshole" to him with a death glare. As Shizune smiled at Ibiki with approval and gave the man a proud hug, Ibiki used the moment she wrapped her arms around him to promptly give Shikamaru the bird in return, all with a big sloppy grin on his scared leather face. Tenten imagined that if they had been three years old each, _neener neener_ would have been spoken by either party followed by someone telling the other to _stick their head in doo doo_.

"Well, as much fun as that was to watch," Tenten finally chimed in as Shikamaru growled and coughed into the carpet, "I still have those reports at my place, Captain, if you wouldn't mind dropping by to pick them up, it would save me an extra trip in the morning."

"I believe I can find some time this evening to be accomodating." Itachi stated, unable to hide the sparkle in his eyes as they parted together.

(I)

"You think I didn't notice the lack of Sharingan?" Tenten smiled knowingly over her shoulder to Itachi, "I think you just like it when I sit in your lap and help you sort out your papers." She leaned off of him for a second to snatch a paper on the distal end of the desk. His warm hands wrapped around her hips, placing her firmly back in his lap. As soon as he had done so, he possessively wrapped his arms around her and whispered in a deep voice in her ear.

"I certainly hope you do not object to performing such tasks with me. It makes them definitively much more agreeable when you are present."

"And in your lap," Tenten added as she snaked a hand around to caress the tender spot on his neck underneath his long hair. He responded in another possessive grunt.

"Especially when you are in my lap." He took the time to hungrily place kisses on her neck, shifting her shirt down to try and gain more soft flesh to nip at as he traced her collar bone.

"You are never going to get out of here if we don't finish this paper work." Tenten chastised him lightly, though didn't bother to move out of the way from the hot kisses he placed on her pulse.

"Who says I want to leave?" he continued his ministrations, hands roaming farther up her along her ribcage under her shirt as he gained more purchase. Then with a sudden halt of his actions he leaned back and announced in an annoyed voice.

"I have decided that your shirt needs to go," and then turned her around on his lap to face him so he could unbutton her frog toggles from a better angle.

"Whoa, whoa," Tenten got up and crossed her hands over her checks. "As much as I am for that idea, _and I am_," Itachi almost looked like he was going to pout, "We need to finish the paperwork and then go some place where we won't be disturbed."

And as if right on schedule, Sauske entered the room with his girlfriend and Itachi could be heard grinding his teeth in order to prevent himself from yelling at everyone and destroying his office with his family's signature flaming jutsu. His diligence and dedication to performing even the mundane tasks such as paperwork was noted with awe from the medic nin holding Sauske's hand. Tenten swore the smile on his face spoke more of how he was going to destroy her shirt once they got to his place that night.

It turns out, that was exactly his plan all along.

He literally ripped her shirt off of her, even as she reminded him that he was messing with a "crazy vindictive kunoichi , capable of holding a grudge for years" according to some of the rumors heard around the Hokage's Tower these days. Her playfully threatening him only seemed to make him more determined to tear her clothes off and show her how exactly what he wanted to do to her in the office before he got so rudely interrupted.

She woke up the next morning to the smell of Itachi making breakfast. She was going to toga it with the bed sheet since her top was currently in strips flung around the room, until she noticed a shirt laid out for her with a note on it.

_I owe you a shirt. Take this one_.

When she walked into the kitchen, the look of her in just one of his shirts caused a fatuous grin to spread across his smug face.

"Was this your plan all along?" she raised an eye brow as she leaned against the doorway. He merely walked over and kissed her on the forehead, then fingered the fan of Uchiha crest on her shoulder before returning to the stove.

"Breakfast, Love?"

(O)

A/N: Thank you to all of my loyal fans and anyone who favorited this, reviewed, or alerted this story or any of my other works! Hope you all enjoyed this! Cheers!

*Jaggedjacket*


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